kallahar writes "President" Bush asked the UN to fully support his "US Does Whatever it Wants" plan in which the US is the only country in the world that matters. "According to top Bush Administration officials, if the measure is passed by the U.N. —and possibly if it is not—the U.S. would immediately launch invasions of Iraq, North Korea, and Cuba; establish oil-drilling operations in Siberia; install nuclear-missile silos in Mongolia along the Chinese border; make English the official language of the planet; detain thousands of Middle Eastern nationals currently in the U.S. on temporary visas; begin each day with a moment of worldwide prayer; and prohibit Japan and Germany from manufacturing automobiles."

[For those that don't know, The Onion is a satirical news site.]